I should have never stopped trying in school & giving up on so much when my parents got divorced. I’d prob be a lot more independent and more book smart.
I should have never fucked a guy just bc my guy at the time fucked some girl bc then when we got back together he wouldn’t have cheated and we wouldn’t have had issues and we wouldn’t have lost trust and I wouldn’t have drove myself insane and I wouldn’t be left with all the insecurities and issues I have now.
I should have not worried about stupid things and I should have concentrated more on school than my bf and maybe I wouldn’t have dropped out of selu.
I should have taken better care of my car and maybe it wouldn’t be so broken.
I should have just learned to manage in my own and make myself happy instead of trying to find comfort in so many other people.
I should have trusted my gut and told my bf no when he asked to get our place and for me to pay all the down payments and trust that he’ll take care of the rest. That 400$ rent could be a 400$ car payment each month for whatever car I want, that 200$ electric bi could be 200$ in clothes every month, other utilities could be just random shit I want or want to do that I can just not afford right now.
I seriously ruined my fucking life & I’m so fucking over it .
I was so in love with you that I ignored how horribly you treated me.